Begin Again

Grey eyes stared at the email he had typed in his laptop blankly. Wondering if perhaps he should just forget about it entirely and delete the email without even sending it. But then again, what could possibly go wrong? It's not like he will lose anything by sending the email anyway. After all, if it turns out that the group had been nothing but a fraud then he will just forget about the matter entirely.

There's no doubt that he will feel disappointed over it but then again he will quickly forget about all of it on the next day. In short, he has nothing to lose. Not wanting to waste any times longer, he quickly clicked the send button before he could change his mind about it. He sighed softly once he was notified that the email had been sent successfully.

The raven haired young man closed his laptop and put it on the bedside table, grey eyes stared out at the clear blue sky through the window in his room. He wondered if it's possible for them to grant his wish. It was a simple wish but then again, it was due to its simplicity that he found himself having a difficulty on making it come true by his own self. What's with his condition and the fact that he basically lives at the hospital.

That's why, he decided to take a leap of faith and sent such email to the rumored group. And now, now that he has sent the email; all that was left for him to do is waiting.

***

Zero stared at the email he had just received on his mobile phone. Today, he had decided to appear as a middle-aged old man with short sandy brown hair and amber eyes. It was another request addressed to Serious Gaming. Zero raised an eyebrow at the request. It was a simple request but it was the way how it was worded that made Zero curious as to what kind of person who had sent such email.

Without wasting any times, he immediately looked for the basic information regarding their newest client. He may not be a professional hacker like Cube but that doesn't mean he doesn't has the skill to do some investigating on his own. Besides, unlike Cube's method which is hacking; Zero has his own skills on finding everything that they need to know regarding their clients. From their background up to their habits, Zero will know about all of it.

Amber eyes narrowed at the medical report in his hands. Now that he has known about it, it wasn't surprising that they got such a request. Taking his mobile phone out of his jeans' pocket, Zero wasted no time to call Delta. It wasn't long before the light green haired young man answered his call.

"What?" Delta's disgruntled voice greeted Zero, the blaring sound of his game told Zero that the other was busy playing games like usual.

"Delta~ it seems that we have to cut your paycheck with the amount of times you used to play games." Zero replied in a sing song manner.

"Shut up! There is no job to do now anyway. What do you want? If you only call to annoy me, I will hang up!" Delta grunted in annoyance.

"But that's the thing, dearest Delta. We just get another job to do. But I will handle this one by myself," Zero grinned even though he knows the other can't see it.

It always nice to mess up with the light green haired young man. Delta always gives him the most amusing reaction. Nevertheless, he has job to do and so after saying some words to Delta regarding the details of the job, he ended the call. Putting his mobile phone back into the pocket of his jeans, Zero quickly thought of the things that he has to prepare to finish this particular job.

First of all, he has to reply the email to their newest client to give the confirmation that they will accept the job. And then, he has to find everything that is need to know about their newest client so he won't make any mistakes. It seems that the job this time will be quite interesting. Smiling in satisfaction, Zero quickly typed the reply for the email before he walked off to do some information gathering with a spring on his steps.

We accept your request. Please read carefully the rules that we have attached along with this email. If you agree with the rules written, we will tell you the payment for it.

***

When he returned back from his daily check up, he was startled to see the notification on his mobile phone. Apparently while he was busy with his check up, he had received the reply to his email. After taking a comfortable position on his bed, he took his laptop from his bedside table and placed it in front of him. Opening his laptop, he quickly logged into his email account and read the reply he was given. Grey eyes read the email carefully before he typed his reply.

I agree with the rules. What about the payment?

Not long after he sent the email, he received another reply right away. It seemed that one of the members of the group was online judging from the very quick reply.

Someone will come to take the box inside the second drawer of your bedside drawers this afternoon. That's the payment.

'The box inside the second drawer of my bedside drawers? Is there even a box inside one of the drawers?' He raised an eyebrow at the reply he was given. Reading the email once again to make sure that he didn't misread it, he frowned a bit to find that no he didn't misread it at all.

He didn't know that there was a box inside his bedside drawers though that's probably because he never once checked it before. Still, if somehow the payment for his request was the box, then the least he could do was to know what's the box is, right? With that thought in mind, grey eyes glanced at the drawers beside his bed curiously as his hand move to pull open the second drawer. There, inside the drawer was the aforementioned box just like what the email had told him.

He stared at the box in befuddlement, not really believing that there was indeed a box inside one of his bedside drawers. Taking the box out, he examined the box cautiously. The box was in the size of a notebook wrapped neatly in brown colored wrapping paper. Though right before he could open the wrapping paper and see what's inside the box, the sound of his name as someone called out to him startled him enough that he dropped the box to the floor.

Grey eyes looked up to see one of the nurses in front of his bed, holding the clipboard which no doubt filled with the result of his check up. The nurse smiled at him lightly before addressing him, "Crescent?"

He nodded his head slowly as he replied back, "Yes? I thought I have finished all my check up for the day?"

"Ah, I'm not here for your check up. I'm here to take the box which is inside the second drawer of your bedside drawers." The nurse answered, a small smile crossed her face.

"Are you from Serious Gaming?"

The nurse only gave him a secretive smile without answering his question as she crouched down and took the box which he had dropped. "Someone will start coming to visit you from tomorrow," The nurse said as she walked towards the door, leaving him alone with his own thoughts.

"Tomorrow, huh?" Crescent mumbled lowly, grey eyes stared at his hands quietly.

He was anxious and excited at the same time for tomorrow to come already. After all, his deepest wish will finally come true tomorrow even though he probably won't remember any of it the next day. Even so, to know that his life will change if only for a bit tomorrow felt a bit surreal for him.

He only hoped that he won't wake up and find out that everything is nothing but a dream. Staring at the email on his laptop once again, he pondered if perhaps he should just erase it. At least, that way, the truth won't ever get revealed. That way, there is no possibility of him finding out that he has no friends at all. That way, starting tomorrow, he will completely forget about his lonely life without a friend.

'Yes. Tomorrow... tomorrow everything will changes. Tomorrow, I will have many friends.' And with that thought, he deleted the email completely so he won't see it again.

***

The next day, Zero walked inside the hospital calmly. He was disguising himself as a woman today. His identity was that of a twenty eight years old woman who works as a kindergarten teacher. Knocking the door of their client's room lightly, Zero slid the door open as she peeped into the room to see whether Crescent was inside or not.

According to the schedule which Zero had acquired, the young man should be inside his room at the moment as he had just done with his check up for the day. And just like what Zero had predicted, Crescent was indeed inside his room. The young man was standing near the window, grey eyes staring out at the city wistfully.

For a moment, Zero couldn't help but comparing the look on the young man's face to that of people who had been living for a long time and completely wary of the world. And even though Crescent was still young in a sense, perhaps there was a deep sense of wariness within the young man even though he doesn't realize it. Not wanting to dwell on the matter far too long as it wasn't in Zero's nature to do so while working, she quickly called out to him in a cheery voice. "Good afternoon~"

The sound of her greeting startled him out of his reverie as grey eyes turned to look at her in confusion. "Uh... good afternoon?"

Zero smiled at the confusion which she could see clearly on the other's face as she walked inside the room and took a seat on the chair beside the bed. "I'm Ophelia, your friend, silly Crescent. How are you feeling today? I come to see you."

"Ophelia? Oh, yes! I'm fine today, thank you for coming to visit me."

"Really? That's good. I'm sorry for not coming yesterday. I was busy with the children." She continued cheerfully while her hand took a camera out of her bag.

"Children?" Crescent inquired softly.

"Yes! I'm a kindergarten teacher so I take care many children at my workplace. Anyway, I bring this with me today. What do you think about taking a picture together with me? You can hang it on the wall afterwards. I personally think your room needs more decoration to brighten it up."

The young man smiled hesitantly at that though he nodded his head in agreement regarding taking a picture together with the woman. After all, there is nothing wrong with taking a picture with your friend. And so, they ended up taking silly picture together as Zero insisted that a silly picture is better than a normal one.

In the end, they spent the rest of Zero's visit with talking and playing games together. Right before Zero left, she left the photo with Crescent as she smiled cheerfully and told the other to hang it on the wall as a memento. Crescent smiled at the woman's kind gesture as he hold the photo close to his chest while promising his friend that he will do so.

The next day after that, when Zero arrived at Crescent's room, there was a photo on the wall which wasn't there on the previous day. That particular photo will be the first of many photos that will fill Crescent's room. Each one with different stories to tell within it. Though Zero doubts that the young man will remember any of it when he gaze at it.

***

"..scared.." He whispered lowly as he mussed his own hair with his fingers.

"Crescent? What are you doing there?" Zero asked, staring at the young man who was squatting in the corner of the room.

The room was unusually dark. And even though it was still afternoon, it was like the sun didn't even reach the room at all with the curtain being closed. It was unlike the young man to close the curtain when it was still bright outside since as far as Zero remembers Crescent dislike being in the dark.

"...don't want to forget..."

"Crescent?"

Crescent took his time to stand, grey eyes stared at Zero who was going as a male nurse this time around. Zero could see the red in the other's eyes and what seems to be the drying trails of the fallen tears beneath them. For a moment, Zero was thinking about asking if the young man was alright but thought better of it and stayed silent instead.

The raven haired young man smiled self-deprecatingly and Zero wondered if someone could look so broken and perfect at the same time like that.

"Who are you?" he asked, once again his voice sound quiet and shy; just like every time they meet with each other before Crescent eventually warm up to Zero later.

"I'm Owen, I work here. I'm the nurse assigned for you though between you and me, it's more appropriate to say that I'm your friend instead of your nurse." Zero replied calmly, telling his usual way of greeting towards the young man with a mischievous smile on his face.

"My friend?"

Zero nodded his head lightly in confirmation as he moved to open the curtain, "Yep. Why the room is so dark? You don't like it dark."

"Uhm... Owen?" Crescent called out hesitantly, without answering the other's inquiry.

"Yes?"

"Uh... I, uhm... just in case I didn't get to say this later... I... thank you," The raven haired young man said softly.

Zero tilted his head slightly to the side, a look of confusion on his face. "For?"

"Well... um... you said that you are my friend, right? So... uh... thank you for being my friend."

The sudden gratitude caught Zero off guard. Even though, it wasn't the first time for someone to thank him, Zero never expected the raven haired young man to thank him. After all, Zero had done nothing except lying to him not that the other was aware of that particular truth though. Besides, he was only doing his job by befriending the young patient. Nonetheless, for a moment, he was at loss of how is the proper way to react to the sudden gratitude he was given from the grey eyed young man.

"No need to thank me for that. That's what friends for, right?" Eventually he decided to use the easy response and said another lie. The words sounded empty to his own ears

though Crescent didn't seem to realize it at all from the beaming smile he gave Zero in return.

"Now, how about playing monopoly? I bring one for us to play," Zero grinned, showing the monopoly board he had brought with him.

"Yeah. That sounds fun," The raven haired young man nodded his head enthusiastically as he walked toward his unmade bed.

"Crescent,"

"Hm?"

"You are loved, you know." Zero locked his gaze with grey eyes for a moment before he chuckled and approached the young man. "How about we take a picture together?"

When Zero left the room, there was another new photo which adorned the wall of the raven haired young man's room.

***

The brown haired man stared at the medical report in front of him silently. Since he had decided to be the one who handles Crescent's case, he had spent many sleepless night just to find the right way to treat the raven haired young man. Caring for Crescent and seeing him every day is definitely not an easy thing to do. Even so, he couldn't stop but get addicted to it.

It was the worst addiction which he doesn't think he wants to stop. His childhood friend who doesn't even remember him anymore. Despite having to endure the frustration, the anger, the confusion and the raw fear he could clearly see on the other's face every time they see each other; Arc couldn't help but cherishes each one of it.

After all, even if Crescent doesn't remember him anymore, even if the young man doesn't see him in the same light as how he used to like before, it's all enough for Arc as long as he could be close with Crescent. And although he won't ever be able to get as close to Crescent as he did before, it's all enough as long as he could get even a glimpse of the raven haired young man's smile.

Even if he will only be nothing but a new face to Crescent. It's all enough. Arc could stay close to Crescent. He could see him everyday even though only as his doctor and nothing more. It's enough. And yet deep down within his heart, there's a small voice that yell at him that it won't be enough. It was a lie. It won't ever be enough for him. Nonetheless, there's nothing Arc could do except telling himself that it's enough.

'Yes. To be able to see him smile again even if it's not at him is enough. It's more than enough.'

After all, he was nothing but a coward. Arc was a coward who doesn't has the slightest courage to tell his childhood friend that they know each other. He was a coward who doesn't has the courage to even start another new friendship between himself and his own childhood friend. Therefore, he has no right to even feel hurt when seeing other people being close with Crescent. If only it's enough to stop the pain that he feels every time he sees his childhood friend smiles at those strangers.

***

"Good morning, Crescent."

"Uhm, good morning?" Grey eyes looked warily at him.

Arc smiled patiently at him as he continued, "I'm your doctor in charge, Arc. How are you feeling today?"

"Arc..? Uhm... I'm... fine, I think? I don't feel anything's wrong. Uh... am I supposed to feel something? Doctor, why am I here? Is something wrong with me?" The raven haired young man answered slowly, grey eyes looked confused for a moment before it widened in fear.

"Hmm?" The brown haired doctor gave him a friendly smile as he wrote something in his clipboard.

Another day, another relapse just like yesterday, another lie to say.

"Don't worry. Nothing is wrong with you," Arc answered gently as he reassured his childhood friend.

Nothing's ever wrong with you.

***

"You know," Crescent said one afternoon after yet another introduction and another fake name that Zero gave to him during Zero's daily visit. "I had this weird dream last night.."

"Weird dream? What kind of dream?"

"It felt so real... the dream I meant."

"Is that so?" Zero asked curiously as he pulled a chair closer to the bed. It seemed like today would be one of those days when Crescent would just like to talk whatever's on his mind away. To be honest, days like these are Zero's favorite since he gets to know more about the raven haired young man directly instead of from the things that Zero had learnt from other people.

"You wanna tell me what is it about?"

For a moment, it looked like as if Crescent wasn't sure whether to tell Zero or not regarding his dream but he finally started with, "I can't really remember much, but I was a junior high school student..."

Zero's eyes sharpened at that. It seemed that the dream was no mere dream at all but more like a memory of Crescent's life. Zero was aware of the story of Crescent's life after all, it was necessary to learn everything regarding the raven young haired man so he doesn't make any mistakes. Nevertheless, this is the first time for Zero to hear about it directly from Crescent himself. Since the grey eyed young man unable to remember much regarding his life thus his reluctance on talking about his life.

"I was sitting in the park, and I remember laughing at the jokes that my friend told me. And when I turned around to see who it is, I saw Arc. He looked younger and... and he looked happy. I have never seen him looking like that, you know. Nowadays, whenever it's my time for check up, he always polite and all but not happy... Not that he looks unhappy either... he just looked... resigned, I think? Is it even the right word for it? Anyway, in that dream... we were close with each other! I meant... Arc and me... we spent so many times together. Playing video games, going to the summer festival and all... it was... I felt so content and..."

Zero didn't realize that he had leaned closer until those grey eyes turned to gaze at him. There was genuine happiness on Crescent's face which in turn made his grey eyes sparkled. It was Zero's first time seeing such expression on the other's face. Even though he had seen Crescent's happy look, it was never to this extent. Apparently the idea of being a close friend with Arc, Crescent's doctor in charge was something that really made him happy.

'Perhaps... the one that he wishes to be friends all along is his doctor though he doesn't realize it himself...'

"...and I felt so happy.” Crescent continued quietly. "I felt so happy that I wished that those moments could last forever. That I could stay friends with Arc forever but then... then... I woke up."

Zero locked his gaze with those grey eyes. The so called master of disguise could clearly see how the sparkle in those eyes get more and more dim as Crescent reached the end of his tale. Until eventually those grey eyes looked like a bottomless hole in the sea during the storm.

"That sounds like a really nice dream." Zero commented after some moments of silence, his hands squeezing both Crescent's hand gently.

"Yea... it was. I wish... I wish I could remember who I am, how I have been living my life all these times and yet... and yet... I can't... why? Why it has to be me?" Crescent asked shakily, words a jumbled mess hiccupping from his throat as he started crying. "Do I even have a family? Is there even anyone who genuinely cares of me? Why? Why it has to be me? Why can't I remember anything?"

Zero said nothing since there is nothing he could say which will make the grey eyed young man feels better. After all, when you can't say anything to make things better, it's better to say nothing at all. And in this case, there was nothing he could offer the other except his presence. So he said nothing as he let Crescent to cry his heart out while simply offering his presence to comfort the others, his hands squeezing Crescent's hands in his grasp.

***

There are many things about his life that he doesn't remember. There are also many things that he never gets right. Although, among many things that he kept forgetting; one of the few things that he was absolutely sure of was the fact that every single day, there is always a visitor who comes to visit him. A friend.

It was impossible for someone like him to have many friends and yet he was being proven wrong repeatedly with every different visitors that come to see him and the amount of photos of him and those people which adorned the wall of his room. He doesn't know when it first started, just like how he doesn't remember much about the things that had happened in his life.

Even so, every single days, he was sure that someone will always comes to visit him whether he knows of them or not. And every single time, they will always introduce themselves as his friend. For him who doesn't remember many things regarding his life, their presence is like the only constant thing in his life.

It comforts him. To know that there are people who are still willing to be his friends despite his condition. For him, having many friends as how he is right now was something that is too good to be true. Still, even if all of it was nothing but a lie, he would gladly let himself being lied to as long as he lives. After all, there is nothing more he fears than being completely alone and forgotten just like how he forgets most things.

***

"Hey, where's Zero? It's been a while since he last come here," Delta commented lightly, his fingers pushing the buttons of his gaming controller rapidly.

"Hm? I thought he is still busy with that client?" Cube replied absentmindedly as his eyes focused on the screen in front of him.

"That client again? What is this? Is he somehow get attached to that particular client? Don't tell me that he grows fond of that client." Delta asked, finally tearing his gaze away from his game to stare dubiously at the tanned hacker.

"Who knows what's in Zero's mind..."

"That client is a special case," Cross yawned softly as he walked out of server room.

"Ah, big brother!! What do you mean with that client is a special case?"

"Assignment 1212 is a special case because the client suffers from dementia. And because the way the request was worded, it was necessary for Zero to keep seeing that client aside from working other assignments." Cross explained as he ruffled Delta's hair gently.

"Are you sure that he doesn't get attached to that client? After all, surely even Zero will grow fond of that client with how often they see each other." Cube asked nonchalantly while still focusing on the screen of his computer.

"Zero isn't the kind of person who will get attached."

"What's the request is about anyway? I didn't read it since Zero said he will handle it by himself." Delta asked curiously.

"I haven't seen it either. Wait, let me look for it." Cube replied as he looked for the email, his fingers moving rapidly against the keyboard before he finally find the aforementioned email. "Here it is."

I want to have many friends. Please be my friends.

"Talk about straight-forward. What's the payment for this request anyway?" Delta whistled in amusement.

"His real memory. The one that he cherishes the most though the client isn't aware of it at all." Cross answered nonchalantly.

"His real memory? How could you take someone's memory? Not that I will be surprised if somehow Zero could do that. That guy is really bizarre." There is a hint of surprise in Cube's voice as he asked Cross.

"More like his memento, I think? The payment is the photo album which filled with the client's memory since his childhood up until now before his sickness. The photo album was inside the box which Zero had brought back several weeks ago,"

"Heh... talk about replacing real memory with fake ones." Delta commented.

"At times, I think people prefers to be lied to than being told the truth anyway. So I guess, it doesn't matter if those memories are all fake." Cube said lowly as he continued working on the assignment which had been given to him.

 ***

Commission Story Written by March Rosenqueen